In a voyage inspired by the spirit of the writer Jules Verne, RRS James Cook, a $100m British research ship, will set sail on its maiden voyage to explore a gaping hole at the bottom of the ocean floor.
I had a really weird day, today.
RRS James Cook will spend six weeks sailing over the Atlantic Ridge taking measurements of the gaping hole on the ocean floor that has baffled experts.
Have you ever had one of those days when you must have been magnetically attractive to shit that pisses you off?
Scientists are trying to find out why hundreds of square kilometres of the Earth's crust is missing, giving a rare glimpse of the mantle, the planet's interior, underneath.
From the first few moments, I turned my alarm clock radio on instead of hitting the snooze, which deactivates the alarm mechanism and sucks if the volume is all the way down. It's nice they put these buttons relatively close.
The hole in the crust covers a huge area of a mountain range hidden beneath the waves and has puzzled scientists because it defies conventional tectonic plate theories.
I stopped at the gas station and the first two pumps I tried didn't work. Was this BP's remedy for premature ejaculation. Either way, I wasn't amused.
We hope to get a direct insight into the processes that go on in the Earth," he said. Crust formation was "a fundamental mechanism of the Earth and affects the ocean chemistry", he added.
At Home Depot, I was buying 4 track light cans and a dozen bulbs. Other than the U-Scan lanes, there was only one register with a long line. At the U-Scan, on bulb scan number 9 of 12 (why is there no option for qty.?) the machine said, "Please wait for assistance." I did this and did it again. Apparently all the employee's thought the steam horn sound coming from my ears meant breaktime.
I will not go into my trip to the bank, crazy ass drivers, red-lights timed against me, Ann Coulter or Chik-fil-A's cold ass waffle fries.
There were two main theories as to why the hole formed and he suspected the answer was likely to be a combination of the two. In one, a hole formed as the tectonic plates pulled apart.
The second theory is what I'm working on now. Please don't discuss when the scientists call; it will only confuse them.
But instead of the mantle pushing up in melted form, or magma, it was lifted in a solid chunk.
I need one of those Bozo sock-em toys, but today, I'm afraid it would enrage me that it bounces back. Keep me away from the kitchen knives.
